Coming home...

Well, my time in Romania is drawing near its close. Only four days left to wrap up loose ends and tell the people who have become my surrogate family goodbye... It is so strange to think that I very possibly may never see them face to face again, as they have become such an integral part of my daily existence and routine. But as Liviu (my good friend) says, "People come and go; that is just life!" It's true. I hope that I will be able to express in some way how much they have meant to me.

It is also hard to believe that I will no longer call Sighisoara my home, won't walk these old cobblestone streets every day, won't stop into the little neighborhood bakery for a croissant, won't rejoice at hearing English being spoken by passers-by, etc.

But, it still feels a bit far away... as there is so much yet undone. Our last few days will be anything but relaxing! But, I suppose that is one of the things that will be so nice about being home.

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So, I know that it has been awhile since I have written, and an update is probably needed on the roof project. Well, I had the opportunity yesterday to visit the family after I cam home from church!

I walked with Mihaela, Maria, Stalutsa, and Alina through deep, wet mud far back into their tiny gypsy village and watched as the "houses" became increasingly tinier, more broken-down, and unstable the further from the main road that we got. Finally, we made it to their home and were greeted excitedly by the family, though they were not really expecting guests.

At first, it was all I could do to keep myself from breaking-down in front of them as I looked around their piece of land, covered in trash and stray dogs who laid on whatever dirty bit of wood, carpet, or plastic who-knows-what that they could find. The kids, thank goodness, were clothed decently (unlike in October when Rebekah visited and few of them had a single article of clothing to their name) and warmly enough to keep away things like frostbite. However, due to the conditions surrounding their little shack, their clothes were caked in inches of new and old dirt, as there has been so much precipitation these past few weeks... and as far as I could tell, they own only the one pair of clothes on their back. Unfortunately, their skin was also covered in this same mud and filth. I wanted so badly to scrub them down with a few gallons each of soapy water. But, even if I did, they would get dirty again so quickly... it is inevitable when you live where they do.

Soon after we arrived and said a few initial hello's, the mother invited me to come inside and take a look at her home. So, I ducked my head and walked inside. As I sat on the bed and looked around, I realized that this house was made of only a little wood, some hardened mud, and a few stones here and there. I wondered how reliable such walls could really be. I also looked around to see their dinner collecting flies on a little stand that I think they call their kitchen. But, I tried to remind myself to be thankful that they actually did have food to eat at all. They weren't complaining, so I needed to see it as a blessing too.

Most of our visit was spent talking to the father of the family about how hard he has tried to get their names back on the list that allows them to receive social aid from the government. He has made the journey many times recently to different government offices with a few people who have taken special interest in trying to help the family receive some permanent help... he is trying so hard to register his frustrations with these officials, asking them to come and visit his little shack and then try explaining to him how they could ever have been taken off the list. My guess is that because they are gypsy, they will not get very far in these attempts. The prejudice against their ethnicity is overwhelming... especially in the government. Hopefully, a few kind souls who aren't of gypsy heritage will be able to get through to these officials on the family's behalf... It is in the works. But it seems as though this poor family is just being dealt one hard knock after another.

The rest of the time we were there, I played games with Demarius (the cutest little girl you could ever hope to meet-- who I think was about 3 yrs. old-ish!) She strutted around proudly with the two pieces of candy Maria got for her and probably could have played peek-a-boo for hours if I had been up for it.

My favorite part of the afternoon though came right before we left. Demarius began singing worship songs she has been hearing at church and wanted to perform for all of us. We all clapped and laughed as she fumbled over some of the harder words but sang so sweetly and sincerely to God, who she most wanted to hear her. It was wonderful. Her mom told us that she does that every morning in bed until the whole house wakes up for the day. And if she ever gets a spanking, she always tells her Mom that she should not be receiving a spanking, she is God's child, not just her Mom's! But before we left, one of the older daughters (maybe 8 or 9 years old) asked if we could all pray together. So, the family took turns praying, kids and all, thanking God for his blessings and for good health.

They were such a beautiful family. It was truly incredible to see their faith and love being poured out to the group of us, most of whom are complete strangers to them! And they had no idea who I was, so I knew that they definitely weren't putting on an act or anything on my account. They were just genuinely glad to share God's love with their new friends.

Before we went, I made a decision not to tell the family who I was... I wanted my participation in the roof project to remain anonymous until I am long gone. It is my prayer that the only face they put to this roof is God's- not the organizers', not the donors', not even the architect's...

Being there made me question even harder how the rest of the donations might be spent. What was of biggest need, besides the roof? Could the home handle any extra construction? At the moment, they have nowhere but the ground around them to use as a bathroom. Could we build them an out-house? Is there something more pressing? Are there other families in even worse shape? These are just some of the questions we are grappling with right now. Next Monday, when the architect goes to begin on the roof... he is going to assess what he thinks the home could handle or if he knows of something else that could be of more help... We are trusting his decision.

Anyway, that is all I know for now. I probably won't get a chance to post again before I leave Romania, so I will probably just talk to you all when I arrive back home!

Lots of love,
Court

Oh my goodness!

Wow. I can hardly believe what God is doing!

My heart is truly overcome, as I have just finished reading some of the emails my Mom has forwarded to me from you, my wonderful friends and family who have so lovingly offered to help this family!

I do not even know how to truly thank all of you... I am just so happy that God can work such beautiful miracles even between people who are oceans and worlds apart! It is truly amazing to see what can be done when we give back a little of what God has given us. Through Him, we can make the hardship and strife that plagues the world a little lighter...

When I see so much generosity flowing the hearts of those around me, I can't help but reflect on what a tremendous gift of LOVE we possess from our Father... sometimes I almost forget that it cannot run out, that I can pass it along to others as many times as God can replenish it- that's a heck of a lot!

Well, I honestly had no idea that so many people would offer donations, but it seems that God has more plans for Romania than I would ever have expected! The donations have already surpassed anything I could have hoped for! We have more than enough to buy this lovely family a roof!! The builder is being contacted today to see when would he can buy the supplies and get started! As soon as he gives the go ahead, hopefully by tomorrow or Friday, I will pull the money out of my account... and he will get started! He has also offered to walk there (it is only a few minutes from where we live, actually) with Mihaela, Maria, and me so that we will be safe and can talk to the family for a little while and get to know them better! I am so excited!

So, as for the leftover donations, I am still in prayer with the other girls about exactly what God might have in store for them. There are many families, individuals, ministries, and NPO's here that could definitely use the money, but we want to make sure that wherever it goes, it is where God wills for it to go, and that it will be used for the glorification of His kingdom. It may not be a decision that can be made even before I leave... if this is the case, the money will be left in the hands of my Romanian sisters until we feel sure about where it is most needed! It is not always a fast process, but if God is at the head... we have assurance that it will work!

That is all I have for now about the project, but I promise updates as I have them! Thank you all again so very much... not just for the donations, but also for all of the prayers you have spoken for this family. I am just sure that those will touch them even as much as the gift of the roof will! I cannot wait to come home and give you all big hugs!

From here, I just wanted to say a word about Anamaria's funeral, which Rebekah and I attended yesterday... as this has been on my heart for so very long.

Yesterday, around 1 p.m. our time, Rebekah and I made the long, cold walk in the rain to the church where the funeral was to be held. When we arrived, we looked around to see a crowd of familiar faces... all sad and worn from crying. Then, in the distance... we saw Mama. Instinctively, we ran to her. She grabbed us tightly and squeezed us in a bittersweet embrace for many minutes. When finally we were interrupted, though only for a moment, she made it clear to those around her that she was busy with "her girls" right now and just wanted to stand with us for awhile. So, we were left in peace. She held our hands gently, and feeling how cold they were, wrapped her own around them as best as she could. Soon, songs were sang around the casket as the crowd looked on, shivering from the cold and from the emotion of it all. Mama began to cry, and I felt her tears begin to fall on my hand... after awhile I could no longer distinguish them from the rain. It was all so overwhelming. I just kept thinking... I am standing here soaked, holding the hand of a mother who is staring at her daughter for the last time in her life on this Earth. Why my hand? People who have known her so much longer and knew Anamaria so well were there too...

But I think God had Rebekah and I there for a reason. Though we were not from her womb, she still considers us her daughters. She needed the comfort of those who call her Mama to be by her side as she said began to say goodbye...

After awhile, my tears of sorrow turned into tears of honor, feeling so blessed to be used by God as a little spark of light in the darkness she is going through. At one point, I caught her wink at me like she used to... for some reason it helped me to know that she would make it through this tragedy. She will be okay in time. God will get her there.

When the service was over, we all drove to the burial plot and watched as the casket was placed into the ground. A few pastors stood around the spot and sang hymns as the dirt was being piled on top of the casket. However, even their soothing words and prayers were not enough to cover up the sound of the dirt dropping loudly onto the casket and sliding off. The sound was painful and threw most of the ground into terrible weeping. Everyone was a mess until finally the pastors told us it was time to leave. Mama found us afterwards and insisted that we walk with Tati to the restaurant where a lunch for friends and family was to be held. So, we of course went with him.

On our way there, we passed by our good friend (or rather, big brother) Hans and realized that on top of everything else that was happening... it was the last time we would get to see him, as he left this morning to return home to the Netherlands after being a missionary here for almost two years. So, just as we had pulled ourselves together, we were thrown back into a fit of tears. He hugged us and told us how much he loved us and would miss us, but it was still just so sad. We had little to spare though, so we kept walking with Tati to the restaurant, trying to stop the crying so as to not upset Mama when we saw her.

We spent the lunch time with some of our Romanian friends and colleagues, and shared more hugs with Mama and Tati when they weren't surrounded by other people. It was a very nice event, and helped every one to compose themselves and be able to share happy memories that they shared with Anamaria.

We left with our director, who had also been invited to attend, and she drove us home. On the way, she shared with us that we were the only two students to ever attend a funeral in Romania and how sorry she was about all of this. But really, I am glad I was able to go. So much about a people can only be learned by sharing experiences such as these with them. It was important for us to experience the good and the bad alike. God has so much to teach us through both.

Anyway, sorry for such a long post... I hope you are all having a wonderful week. I can't wait to see you again in less than 3 weeks!

-Court

An opportunity...

Being in Romania, surrounded daily by extreme poverty and heart-breaking remnants of a tyrannical, communist regime... I have often found myself writing posts which display the despair I have seen (and through the empathy God has bestown to me, have also been forced to deal with myself).

However, being here has also taught me a great deal about love, and how any small favor, act of kindness, or blessing of generosity can mean a world of difference to someone who is suffering. We have all been plagued with sadness, grief, loneliness, or despair of our own... and we know that it is often these small trinkets of true, "no-strings-attached" love that keep us afloat when we feel we can no longer fight the storm. It is to this end that I write today.

I have been given the chance to help a family who needs it more than almost any I have heard of here, and I wondered if maybe a few of you back home might also like to help. In a post I wrote, what seems like ages ago, I thanked you all for the genrosity you had offered in the giving of some of the wealth you have been blessed with, but told you that for the time being I did not think I could accept it, as I was sure then that I did not know how best to use it. But, after months of prayer with some of my Romanian sisters... I think I can say confidently that I know how God might be calling for the money to be used, should its offer still stand!





These pictures reveal but a small piece of the story of Romania's countless families living in destitution. Sadly, many here would feel truly lucky to even have as much as this family you see before you.

This family lives penniless, worn-down, overwhelmed, and without basic needs being met every single day. But, unlike many families around them who have, in their hopelessness, turned to stealing, looting, and other desperate behaviors to try and survive... they have boldly turned instead to God. Somehow, they have managed even in the gravest of situations they have found themselves in to place their faith in the Father... and have said time and time again that they know what it is like to live only on "their daily bread," and that it is important to be thankful even for that.

They live in a gypsy village, unfortunately too dangerous for me to travel to. Mihaela (one of my wonderful Romanian sisters) can visit only sparingly due to the risk involved, but has managed to build a realtionship with them that has touched her heart very deeply... as it has now done for Maria, Rebekah (who was able to go once before the violence in the neighborhood became so big a problem), and me.

When I heard about this family for the first time, I could hardly believe what I was hearing. How can they demonstrate such strong faith in their conditions? How can they continue to be so bold in their convictions when they live in such a dangerous area where no other Christians exist? How amazing.

Soon, we heard even more about their struggles... This family of eight is not only living in a room no bigger than most of our walk-in closets (with no bathroom nor place to eat, and with but two tiny beds to their name)... but they were also living completely without a roof. Since I have been here, it has rained no less than two days a week, snowed already more than six inches, and has dropped to bitterly frigid temperatures that I can barely convince myself to walk down the street in.

This is how they live... huddled in their shack, freezing beneath snow falling into their beds, praying and thanking God for his blessings. Knowing this, I could not bare to leave and not have tried to help them... So, after discussing this with Rebekah, we decided to ask Maria and Mihaela if they thought we might be able to do something, anything to help this family, hoping that those who had offered a small donation at the beginning of our journey in Romania would still be happy to give alongside us.

Upon our request, we saw them both get a huge smile on their face. We asked why they seemed so happy, and they told us it was because they have been praying for so long that God would somehow help them to find a way to build the family the roof they so desperately need. They had already checked into the costs and talked with builders (actually one of whom I know well and greatly admire) who might be willing to put it on if they found a way to purchase it. Immediately, seeing that this was surely no "chance" occurance, the four of us threw ourselves into prayer about the possiblity.

God gave us answers, though maybe not as soon as we may have hoped for, and helped us to nail down (no pun intended) some of the logsitics of how we could go about it. The roof will cost a little over $300 U.S. dollars and though won't be the sort of roof you and I might purchase (not at all aesthetically pleasing and only semi-permanent, which we are told by our trusted architect and wondeful friend, David- will last many years, but probably not for the rest of their lives) it will be more than enough to keep out the elements and to even trap in some of the heat that at the time being does not exist at all in their little home.

So, though I know I am asking this of you incredibly late into my trip, I know that all of this has happened exactly in God's timing... and that even if I am not able myself to see the final product before I leave... I hope to still raise enough funds to put up the roof as soon as is physically possible!

To get things started, I am pledging $50 of my own. And it is my hope that some of you who have asked how you could get involved might be able to donate $5, $10, or even $20. It will go such a long way and will mean more to this family than we could probably ever know. Whatever amount is left over, my Dad has generously and lovingly offered to pay so that this family will not go another Chrsitmas exposed to the cold! But, instead of doing it all on our own, I really wanted to offer everyone the opportunity to take a part and share in the joy!

Sometimes we want so badly to change the world, or even just one person's circumstances, but just don't know how to do it... but when an opportunity like this presents itself, and we feel like maybe God is stirring in our hearts to take it... we simply must!

If you would like to offer any donations, just leave a comment with the amount you would like to give or send me an email (I check it every day but Sunday)! The best way I could think of to work the donations out is to just collect it as soon as I return home, and until then, I will just cover whatever is offered with my savings account so the work can get started sooner rather than later... the winter is just getting worse!

Thank you all for your time in reading this. I would love it if you could please pray for this wonderful family and that their faith might rub off on the families around them! And whether or not God calls you to be involved in the roof project, please keep this family on your hearts, that is just as important!!

And please also continue to pray for Mama and Tati. I will see them today at Anamaria's wake, and will pass on all of the love you have displayed for them as they have gone through this tragedy. It is so good for them to hear that so many Christians the world over are lifting them up! I love you all!

-Court (who will return home in only 19 days)

Another saint in Heaven

I wanted to let everyone know of the news we received on Thursday afternoon.

Roberta (our pastor) called us and asked us to please stop and pray for Mama and Tati, for Anamaria had passed away late Wednesday night. The news did not come as a shock, as we knew things had gotten very bad for her, but all the same it was so hard to hear.

Our hearts sank, and we tried our best to pray. We were reassured that the passing had been very peaceful... as it happened while she was sleeping. We took comfort in this blessing, remembering all the pain she had been in her last few days.

And though I never had the opportunity to meet Anamaria, I was blessed to have gotten to hear her voice and her beautiful words of encouragement and love on the phone before she became extremely sick. It may not sound like much, but she truly touched my life that day as she offered up her prayers for me and Rebekah and shared in inspiring vulnerability the struggles she was facing as a result of being ill so far from home.

I will never forget this conversation as long as I live. It is strange and wonderful to think that even near the end of her life, she was still ministering to the souls of others, even those she never had the chance to meet. I cannot even imagine how many lives she touched while she walked this Earth. It seems that everyone we talk to has a story of their own that just shows what a godly woman she was and how giving and kind a heart she had.

But now I sit here torn in how I feel about her death. On the one hand, I am so sad for Mama and Tati... what terrible sorrow I know they are facing. I can't imagine losing my only child, my little girl who meant everything in the world to me.

And on the other hand, I am so glad to see Anamaria relieved of her suffering. I remember hearing the beautiful words of an old pastor which reminded us all that we are only being loaned to this planet for a short while and that when we die, He is simply taking back that which was already His... bringing us back to Himself to live in eternal glory. Looking at death in this way reminds me that life is short, and like Anamaria did, I hope to spread God's love as best as I can while I still have the chance. Afterall, we never know when He will decide to bring us home.

Mama is back in Romania now with Tati, but I haven't seen them since Anamaria passed away. I am not sure what I will do or say when I do get to see them. Nothing can take away their pain right now.

So, I would like to ask for prayers for everyone who knew Anamaria, and of course special prayers for Mama and Tati. And when you pray, please pray for their faith in Christ... they have been understandably shaken by this, and I know that for Mama at least, her faith has been tested to its breaking point.

Thank you all for being so dedicated to Anamaria, Mama, and Tati. It has touched my heart more than you could know to read about all of your prayers and thoughts for my Romanian family.

And finally, to Anamaria... my sister in Heaven:

I thank you for the way you showed Jesus Christ to those who knew you...
Through your suffering, you never abandoned Him
In your hardship, you still served His kingdom.
Your life is truly an inspiration to us all,
and even in your death...
we still remember what you taught us.

I thank you also for sharing your family with me.
You allowed me to be a part of your life...
and treated me as your sister,
a gift I will appreciate forever.

And one day, when God has taken me home too, I hope to finally meet you face to face...

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

Well, the rumors were, in fact, just that. We will not be traveling to Ukraine, much to my dismay.

...However, we ARE traveling to Budapest, Hungary instead! We are leaving Thursday morning around 3 a.m. It is ten hours in an EXTREMELY cramped van. We have no room for luggage, so we are backpacking it all the way! We probably will not be home until Sunday night... so I won't update again until next week sometime. Anyhoo...

HAPPY THANKSGIVING everyone!!! I hope it is a wonderful day for all of you and that you have lots of fun eating and napping (the inevitable after-dinner activity) with the family.

--Please pray for Anamaria... we heard word on Sunday that things have gotten drastically worse for her and that she is probably in her last few days... I hesitate to deliver this news, however, because so many people here in Romania are acting as though no hope is left.... and are resigning themselves to despair. I want all of us though to keep praying for that miracle! It can still happen! As my friend Magda Balabon put it: "Let hope die last!"

The end of an era...

The time has come and gone. Environmental Science has wrapped up for the semester, complete with an impossible final and a plethora of papers, debates, and presentations.

Now, life may return back to its Romanian normal, for which I am quite grateful. I have missed the sounds of teenagers giggling at my attempts to speak their language with any sort of grammatical accuracy and the incessant questions and begging about when I am going to bring peanut butter cups to my colleagues.

Things are well here in Sighisoara as the semester continues to come to a close. But I am still learning new things every week. Last week, I learned how to change a tire when ours busted after youth group. I learned how to turn human beings into caterpillars using saran wrap. I learned how talk "Californian." And today, I learned how to meow in such a way as to become friends with a stray cat and let it know that I wished only to pet it until it was no longer in the mood to be pet. All very helpful things, I'd say.

Hmm... I wish I had more to update about, but often things are just so difficult to explain without visuals or voice.

Oh yes, I do have a rumor to spread- the validity is yet undetermined but seems pretty legit. I may be traveling to the lovely country of Ukraine over Thanksgiving with the rest of the girls in the program. We would be travelling with our director and staying with a friend of hers. I think that would be amazing! But, I'm not getting my hopes up quite yet... anyway, that's the word on the cobblestone street.

Well, not much else to say. I will talk to you all soon!

My own revolution... a fenceless Romania

So, as I was walking to school a couple of days ago, I began to notice a trend in my surroundings. Everywhere I looked, there were fences. I began to wonder to myself about their necessity. Very few Romanians have pets, and of the ones who do... almost NONE of them keep their pet outdoors. So, the fences aren't there to protect animals. The fences are not really tall enough to keep out intruders, as I could climb over with a good thrust (and I am not very coordinated)... so that can't be the reason. Hmm... so, then I wondered if perhaps they just built them for privacy, but again realized that it could not be this either. The fences all have huge spaces between the posts where people like myself can peek in (and again they really are very short as well). So why could it be that there are so many fences?

I have come to a conclusion....

People have put up fences to try and keep me from seeing all of the beautiful flowers and plants that they are hiding. They do not want me to stare at their lovely gardens or to gaze in awe at their grape vines. They want to keep away all of those who wish to take a photograph of the splendor that is their wild vegetables and rare trees. Why must they be so stingy?!

So, I am calling for a Romanian revolution.... life without fences. That way, all of the passers-by can take in the flowers and leaves and smells properly without old wooden posts to stand in their way. I have been caught too many times peeping through holes and spaces by disturbed owners! They should accept that I appreciate their yards, but no... they do not. So a country without fences it is.

Anyway... life in Romania continues to provide its ups and downs. It has only been recently that I've realized I actually LIVE here. A man in costume came up to me in the citadel a couple of nights ago and thanked me for visiting and wished me a good weekend here in Sighisoara (blue eyes here will give you away every time)... to which I replied, "Thank you, sir, but I actually live here." He looked puzzled. But it is true. I have now been living in Romania for over 2 months. I go to school and work during the day and come "home" every night to my "family." Yes, I live here. It is so strange to think of it this way. I am less than a native but more than a guest or visitor. Kind of cool, I think.

Environmental Science class is LONG. And while it has been a lot of fun with the group of European Nazarene students who've come and taken it with us, I will be ready for it to end! While it has been going on, I have had to put Teen Club on hiatus, which makes me very sad. I love working with the youth everyday... they are so much better than science! Plus, we are finally beginning to build a bond with some of them and I hate not being able to show up for two weeks. But, I am still going to the youth group on Tuesday nights, so at least I still get to hang out with kids somewhere!

As far as language class is concerned... I have pretty much checked out for the semester. I just don't think I can shove any more languages into my brain. I already have 18 years of English, 2 years of Spanish, and 1 year of Biblical Greek up there. Where is it supposed to go?! We have a huge Romanian exam at the end of the month which will be the only determinant in our grade for the class. It is sort of a pass/fail thing. I hope I am not the latter.

An update on Alfred the dog: He has moved on, that nomad. He is now living in the citadel, where I see him briefly every few days. He pretends not to remember me. I think that makes it easier on him. Ha ha.

That's all from here. I hope everyone is doing well!